ArcaMax

DEAR SUSAN: Your "true or false" quiz really has me thinking!

You ask us to respond to the statement "Men and women cannot be friends; they're too dissimilar." I find that to be both true and false. Men I've already had a relationship with can continue our friendship but at arm's length. The emotional closeness I feel with female friends simply...Read more

When was the last time you took a trip? A genuine, out-of-neighborhood venture, not a trip to the local amusement park sort of thing. Well, dear heart, I'm here to encourage you to start planning a major motion. And the first step is going to a travel agency to look through its travel brochures. The conversation between the two of you will lead ...Read more

Around the same time the newly singled realize their bed-hopping adventures actually make them lonelier, a growing awareness of themselves as a distinct entity takes hold. Standing on one's own, recognized as a person in one's own right, starts to feel good. Really good. The loneliness is still there, of course, felt most in the early-morning ...Read more

Coming back to home base is never easy. Astronauts are well aware of the complexity of returning to Earth's atmosphere. Immigrants resettling in the homeland must face the challenge of unlearning new ways while relearning the ones from childhood. And (deep, deep sigh) singletons are faced with the momentous challenge of rejoining peers after a ...Read more

The ongoing battle to hold on to our hard-earned personhood while in a love relationship demands self-confidence and self-awareness. But what about encouraging your beloved to also be an individual? What about having the maturity (hate the word) and wisdom (a much better one) to grant them -- nay, encourage them -- to own breathing space to be ...Read more

Parenting is a privilege. Being the main influence in the lives of your children is an honor and a blessing. And at times, a royal pain in the neck!

But single parenting has to be -- hands down -- the most complex, demanding situation in all of the single world. It's exhausting, complicated, seemingly never-ending, emotionally draining -- and ...Read more

DEAR SUSAN: The other day, a friend said that I'm angry at men and I seem to resent them, even if they're nice. Any thoughts on why this could be? -- Sallie D., New York City

DEAR SALLIE: There are many possible roots to your anti-male mindset, starting with the family dynamics in your home. I'd like you to scan the whole list of possibilities ...Read more

A recent letter in this column has stirred up a virtual hornet's nest. It comes from a 30-something man who -- vigorously and rather unpleasantly -- stakes claim to nearly all parenting rights and privileges in his (hypothetical) marriage. At the moment, he's neither husband nor parent. But he has thought through the battles he'd wage. Example: ...Read more

Dear Susan: I used to only date men who were taller than me. But now I'm engaged to someone almost 3 inches shorter than I am, and honestly, he's such a great person I couldn't care less. (From the internet)

Dear Blogger: At last, good sense makes a comeback! (I don't know your age, but I'll bet my shiny new printer you're upwards of 30. That ...Read more

DEAR SUSAN: Responding to your recent survey:

-- How late in the week can a man call you for a date? ANS: Whenever he wants to, provided he doesn't show up at my doorstep unannounced! If I'm busy, I'll say so. If not, I'm happy to accept his invitation.

-- Do you think he respects you more if you set a deadline? ANS: No. Deadlines are for the ...Read more

Dear Susan: I was widowed in February after being married 35 years. My husband and I married in our 30s, so I do have some experience being single, but now I'm sort of lost. Our marriage was so close we kept our friends at the periphery, which only adds to my problems. Have you some back material I could download or purchase online? Thank you. -...Read more

There's a fiction circling singleworld that making your life comfortable and secure while you're unmarried consigns you to a life sentence there, with no chance of parole or reprieve. Well, this lady engineer is over the moon to announce that the myth is pure fiction! The reality? The more interesting you make your singleness, the more relaxed ...Read more

--Readiness is all. The same person who didn't stir you 10 years ago might just knock your socks off today because you've grown and now see their better points ... and maybe -- just maybe -- because you're now ready to make the commitment. Stay open.

--How many people do you know who look at marriage as an experience rather than a commitment? (...Read more